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What To Do When A Guy Acts Interested Then Backs Off

By Last Updated: September 29th, 2022Categories: Relationship Counseling

Human emotions are confusing. It’s hard to tell what a person really feels towards you. Like when a guy acts like you mean the world to him, but a minute later he suddenly becomes cold towards you.

That scenario right there is confusing and at the same time very hurtful. As a girl, if you see a guy act sweet and loving you may develop feelings for him over time. But if he suddenly backs out, that will be a total heartbreak.

Now I know there are some ladies out there who have been in this situation, and I know it’s very confusing. So to help you, we listed some things that you need to know when a guy acts interested then backs off. Read on!

Reasons Why a Guy Acts Interested then Backs Off

Everything that happens in our lives has reasons. There is also a reason why a guy acts interested and then backs off. Yes! There might be something going on in his life that prevents him from pursuing his feelings towards you.

Always remember, whatever that reason is, you have to prepare your heart and keep an open mind.

1. He Realized You’re Not the One

Our feelings towards one person can change at any moment. We often realize things and it suddenly changes everything.

This could be the reason why that man has suddenly become cold towards you. Maybe he saw something in your character that made him think that you’re not the one for him. Maybe he thinks you’re too good for him or he’s too good for you. Or maybe you don’t possess something that he’s looking for.

He Realized You’re Not the One

He might have seen something about your attitude or he disagrees with your beliefs in certain things like relationship rules, politics, etc. Try to remember your last conversation with him, you might have said something that offended his pride and opinions.

But hey! This doesn’t affect your worth as a woman and as a person. You’re still worth loving.

2. You’re Not the Only Woman in His Life

This situation is quite familiar to me, it didn’t happen to me personally, but it wrecked my best friend’s heart.

She was entertaining a guy for months, they always have video calls and even go out on dates from time to time. Although they’re not officially dating, she thinks that is where the relationship is going. But the guy suddenly stopped contacting her and blocked all of her accounts. Turns out, the man was married and his wife just got back from working outside the country. He was afraid to get caught cheating that’s why he decided to cut all ties with my friend.

You’re Not the Only Woman in His Life

Now, you don’t have to overthink, but this might be the reason why your guy acts interested then backs off. Maybe he decided to choose another woman over you, or he was caught by his partner cheating with you.

If you find out that this is the reason why he backed off, you better leave him, girl. It will be such a shame if you get entangled in this kind of relationship.

3. He’s Not Sure of Your Feelings

Maybe this man is making a move on for some time now, but he doesn’t feel the same energy from you. He’s thinking that maybe you’re just playing with him, or you just like the idea of him but don’t think of him as a lover.

He is not sure whether your feelings are true and he doesn’t want to assume and get hurt, that is why he decided to distance himself from you. Try to think things through, this may be the reason why you can’t find love.

4. He’s Too Shy to Make a Move

Men are perceived as courageous but believe it or not when it comes to a girl they like, that courage doesn’t always show up. Some men are too shy to make a move; they just back off and leave the girl hanging.

If this happens to you, I personally recommend not to chase that dude. If he’s not man enough to confess to you, he may not be ready to face real relationship issues. This will cause a lot of trouble and will eventually lead to a breakup. But, if you really like him, you can try to make a move and do things to make him want you.

5. He has Other Priorities

One of the reasons why we don’t pursue some things in our life is because of our priorities. And let’s be honest, some of us have a lot of stuff to deal with, and sadly love is the last thing we want to prioritize. Maybe he wants to focus on his career, studies, family, or himself.

He has Other Priorities

This is the reality for some people, and we never know, maybe this is the reason why he acts interested then backs off. Maybe he needs to focus more on other things and set aside love for now.

What to Do When a Guy Acts Interested then Backs Off

Being left hanging and ghosted is one of the worst things a woman can experience. I know that going through this situation is hard and heartbreaking. So here are some things you can do after a guy acts interested and then backs off.

1. Focus on Your Healing

This may not have ended in an official relationship but it will hurt. Accepting the fact that the love you’re expecting suddenly disappears without notice is a hard pill to swallow.

That is why, before anything else, you have to focus on yourself first. Give your heart time to heal. Don’t rush and take things slowly. Do things that will make you happy and feel better.

Focus on Your Healing

Maybe try out new things and learn a new skill like baking, knitting, playing a certain instrument, or even traveling. This will help you get your mind off him and will heal your heart faster.

2. Talk to Him Openly

I know this is a hard one, but talking to him may help your healing. Plus, a closure will also be no good for both of you.

You can ask him why he did such a thing, or if his feelings were true, etc. Just remember to keep an open mind and be ready for all the things you will hear.

But it does not work for everyone and will depend on the circumstances. Read #3.

3. Cut All Ties with Him

If that guy is somewhat complicated like he is in another relationship or he’s a playboy, forget what I said on #2. You have to stop talking to him and avoid any trouble. Or if you can’t stand talking to him again, it’s alright too. You also have to protect your mental health and stay away from toxic people.

4. Be Ready to Open Your Heart Again

You can’t stay alone and bitter forever, there is a lot of fish in the sea! Don’t waste your time hating someone that left you alone. Your happiness and life shouldn’t be affected by other people.

Be Ready to Open Your Heart Again

Instead, keep your heart open and always have a positive vibe. But remember, don’t rush things. True love will come at the right place and at the right time.

Last Advice

Looking for love is not easy. You will go through a lot of heartbreaks and challenges. But remember that those things happen to prepare you for the great things that will happen in the future.


What is gaslighting?2022-09-26T09:42:56+00:00

It is an act of mentally and emotionally manipulating someone. It is when someone is trying to flip the situation and act as a victim while putting all the blame on you.

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It is when someone constantly compliments you or wants to be around you. Love bombing is a dramatic profession of love and devotion, or bombarding you with grand gestures or expensive gifts.